Starbucks Toe

Toe Factor: 4 (not great toe, but cmon...)
Seen: Cirque de No Way

Starbucks and coffee have come a long way. We used to order coffee by saying "Coffee please". Now we have to indicate size, type of milk used, and blend, all while speaking Italian. I resent having to speak Italian in my own country, particularly when addressing people who also don't speak Italian. So, I generally use the traditional "large" or "medium" instead of "Venti" and "Grande". When the employee responds, "You mean Venti?", I say, "yeah, large". But other than the phony Euro wannabe language, I don't hate Starbucks. Hating Starbucks is so cliche. The coffee is decent, no matter what yuppies and hippie clowns will tell you. Sure, it is a chain. But it is also one of the few acceptable places to take a public dump. They always have a decent crapper. And because it is a single-user crapper, you get to look at the victim that has to walk in after you have nuked the joint, which is a bonus. So, let's give Starbucks a break until some other chain comes up with a decent growler.